Let’s face it, the world probably needs a whole truth and reconciliation after that Netflix’s Tinder scammer†
Aside from the daring scheme that has trapped dozens of women in years of debt, there are men and women (but mostly men) on various social media platforms calling its victims gold diggers.
So in this piece, I’m going to dig into the idea that “the best prospector has won,” and I’m going to reveal why men are the real prospectors of today.
I’m about to upset a lot of people with my opinion, but in the wise words of Eminem in his hit rap duet with Jay-Z, “If the shoes fit, I’ll wear it, but if it doesn’t then ya’ I will just swallow the truth, grin and endure.”
Tinder Swindler Had An Emotional Con
People who call the Tinder Swindler’s gold prospectors’ victims have missed a crucial detail in this documentary.
Simon Leviev is an emotional predator. He was able to hunt women’s deep-seated desire for companionship with men who are financially secure/independent. His victims were looking for love and support from a man who can survive in a relationship.
The fact that he pretended to be the heir to a diamond fortune was a bonus. Leviev’s financial status was crucial to the scam, as the man he portrayed would be able to effortlessly repay the loans his partner had borrowed on his behalf.
Leviev performed an emotional scam. He said and did all the right things to get women to lower their guards and let him in along the walls erected to protect them from previous bastards.
He chased a woman’s inherent desire to want to protect and support her partner when he is in need.
The women Leviev prayed for were not poor women who needed a man’s financial support to survive or maintain a certain lifestyle.
They had clearly worked to establish independence and, most importantly, build good credit scores. (I must also take a moment to acknowledge the white privilege that, on a whim, entitled these women to multiple loans, renewals, and large amounts of cash, often with fake paper).
Their lives seem fulfilled differently, but they are clearly lacking in love and companionship, which is why they are swiping and matching around the web.
Their only claim to the title “gold digger” is because they chose to date a man who appeared to be rich.
Gold diggers don’t have much to offer at the relationship table other than a trophy mate and physical intimacy.
He systematically and financially hard-working women disempowers them and leaves them in debt for a lifetime.
Women who were independent, living alone and generally just doing that had to go back home because they are now broke.
This documentary also proves that cybersecurity officials worldwide are useless – law enforcement incompetence is not exclusive to South Africa.
Worse still, financial institutions have little incentive to catch people like Leviev because the women pay back the money anyway, so it’s not their loss.
In short, while our power-hungry leaders are vying for power, cybercriminals are thriving.
Men as gold diggers
We never hear about men seeking gold as it has always been exclusively for women.
But this is what the male version of gold digging looks like.
During this time, marriage is often postponed in favor of cohabitation first. You don’t really get to know your partner until you live together and it makes financial sense to share the cost of living.
Men will honestly tell their partners that they want to get married in the future to take them to the next level.
This is the level at which the man feels most comfortable because the economic burden is shared and all he has to do is make a promise without committing to a deadline, while the woman has to wait for a proposal, often years.
This upliftment of the relationship is not motivated by love, it is an economic contract with benefits that essentially gives men more value out of the relationship.
The man who promises marriage as the end goal of living together, but never actually proposes, or worse, proposes them without any intention of walking down that aisle, are the real gold diggers.
They use their partners for economic stability and to share the cost of living under false pretenses. We just don’t call it what it is, because in the past gold prospecting was seen as exclusive to women.
Hell, a woman who expects a man to be financially stable or to be the supplier in the relationship is also branded as gold diggers because women are less likely to date a poor man.
Men who lived together for years with the initial promise of marriage as the end game would have taken advantage of all the comforts and conveniences of marriage without actually having to commit. That is a lengthy emotional scam, which is morally and ethically repugnant, but with no legal recourse.
The most daring act of this mundane scam, in my opinion, is how the couple in this situation ends up buying real estate together because it is difficult to qualify for a single-income home loan.
So the uncommitted man suddenly has no problem committing to joint bond payments for decades, but no mention of the first promise or marriage?
And men will have a quiver filled with ready-made excuses to forgo a first declaration of love.
Male prospectors are the ones who fail to live on their own financial strength, so they choose to share the cost by pledging lifelong commitment – but they never really commit†
Today, the women caught up in these long-standing scams often waste years of their lives with the wrong person.
Fortunately, times are changing and women are beginning to realize that companionship and relationships are like owning a Lamborghini: it’s nice to have, but way too expensive to keep and too much maintenance.
Confidence in men is at an all-time low, and there is definitely a huge shift going on from the idea that companionship and love relationships are the ultimate versions of happiness and fulfillment when it comes to living an abundant life on Earth.
Of course, one cannot express such an opinion without emphatically saying, “Not all men.”
So, for legal and ego purposes, not all men, but if the gold-digging wellington boots fit…